Lost my keys :D :D

A person goes to the doctor with his 3 year old son.

Person: - Doctor, my son has swallowed a key.

Doctor:- When did he swallowed a key?

Person:- 20 days back.

Doctor:- And you are coming to me now, after 20 days.

Person:- We had a duplicate key, but we lost it today.

Woman

ωσмєη ωιll вє ωσмєη...
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A 54 year old woman had a heart attack & was taken 2 the hospital.

While on the operating table she had a near death experience.

Seeing God she asked, "Is my time up ?"

God said, "No, you have another 34 years 2 live."
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Upon recovery, the woman decided 2 stay in the hospital
& have a face-lift, liposuction, & tummy tuck. She even changed her hair color

Finally she was released from the hospital.

While crossing the road on her way home, she was killed by a truck.

Arriving in front of God, she asked,

"You said I had another 34 years 2 live.
Why didn't you save me from the truck?"

(You'll love this)
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God replied:
"I couldn't recognize you!"